Every time you make a decision to stick with your principles instead of indulging your weaknesses, you get stronger spiritually. And eventually this spiritual strength becomes a part of your identity. I don’t think of myself as a nonsmoker or “ex-” anything, because smoking and other vices are things I would never do in a million years.
The only way to instill a permanent change is to change your identity. As long as you define yourself by a behavior you want to eliminate, your efforts to change will be in vain because subconsciously, you’ll treat your changes as a temporary situation.
I don’t define myself as a person who doesn’t take drugs — I’ve never done drugs and never plan on doing them. Why would I define myself as a non-drug user?
In essence, that’s what people do when they say they’re ex-smokers or ex-convicts. That’s behind you. Embrace the present and develop a different, positive definition of yourself that will explain who you are and what you do today, not what you’re no longer about or what you’re no longer doing.
As a vegetarian, I don’t think of myself as a person who used to eat meat. I’m a person who eats a plant-based diet. It doesn’t matter how flavorful you tell me this piece of chicken is — I won’t eat it .
Your decision to be self-disciplined has to be equally firm. Don’t define yourself as a person who used to be lazy or lacking discipline. Define yourself as a person who’s doing his or her best to ensure the best future possible. No matter how enticing the temptations are, your self-definition will ensure that you’ll stay away from them.
Maximum Mindset is an independent writing and digital publishing project focused on clearer thinking, stronger discipline, confidence, and meaningful personal change.